A little post baby survival guide

Warning: This is about to get real. Really real. Like nipple cream real. 

So I have about five more weeks before our second baby boy makes his appearance. I am excited to see our family grow. 

But I am also a little freaked out because... well... I remember that having a baby hurts. But it's called labor for a reason. Right?

So in my preparation I decided I would make a list of what I consider necessities for getting through those days and weeks after the big push. 

1. Lanolin. If you're planning on nursing you are going to need some lanolin. Trust me. You will need this. It makes life a little more bearable and later it can double as diaper rash cream. You can also use Bella B nipple butter. It's vegan if you're worried about using an animal-based product. 

2. Perri Bottle. Um... there is going to come a time when you will need to use the facilities and toilet paper us just the enemy. Use a perri bottle. They will give you one at the hospital. But it you lose it you will want a back up. 

3. Tucks Pads. Sometimes when pushing there are Hemorrhoids. You will want some Tucks Pads. You can keep them in the fridge. Go ahead and get yourself some cream too. 

4. Soothies. These gel pads are a lifesaver when you're first nursing. You through them in the freezer and then stick them on when you need them. Get some. Trust me. 

5. Nursing Cover. There will come a time when you just don't care anymore. But until then invest in a nursing cover. 

6. Cooling Spray. They will probably hook you up with some cooling spray at the hospital. Use it. It helps I promise. 

7. Sitz Bath. They should give you one at the hospital. If not, ask. But this is vital after baby's arrival. I recommend using it 15 minutes twice a day. 

7. Nursing Tank. This great tank can be worn 24 hours a day. I wore them in the hosptial and long after that. Get a couple. 

This post contains affiliate links.  

Mommy Monday: What's in a Birth?

Before you have your baby everyone will tell you that everything you go through, the discomforts of pregnancy, the pain of labor, will all be worth it when you see your babies face. 

And they are right. But they will also lie to you and tell you that you forget the pain of labor. Um... no. That's a big 'ol lie. It's called labor for a reason. If it didn't hurt it would be called a spa day. 

Today's Mommy Monday Topic is- Giving birth: What you really should know about having a c-section or a natural delivery.

Well, I wouldn't know about either one of those. And frankly, I don't want to go into all the "gory" details of my first son's birth. 

That's me about 12 hours into labor. Don't I just look fantastic?!?! (Sarcasm.) 

I will tell you this, I remember enough to be a little afraid of my impending due date (in just 8 weeks). 

I was in labor for 19.5 hours. It felt like 100 years. It was painful and frustrating. And I am sure it was made longer and more painful by the amount of medical intervention I had. 

Here is my opinion on child birth. Do what you want to do and what you feel is best for BOTH you and your baby.

If you want to have a natural child birth in a medical setting. Go for it.

If you are interested in a water birth at home. Do it!

If you are using a midwife or doula. That is fantastic! 

If you want them to back you out of the elevator with an x on your back so they know your ready for an epidural. Do it. 

Don't let other's opinions scare you, intimidate you or make you feel guilty. Just stop listening to people now because people will try to give you parenting/nursing/medical/baby advice for the rest of your child's life. 

But do your research. Know the pros and cons of all your options. Ask a lot of questions. And be ready to stand your ground at the hospital. 

Check out Erin, the other Erin and Iris to see what they have to say on this, Mommy Monday. 

Things I hope to teach my son(s)

Photo by Candid Photography 

I know my husband and I are going to teach our son(s) a lot of things. We're going to teach him to tie his shoes, drive a car and how to read and write his name. 

But there are some other, maybe even bigger things that will hopefully make his life easier. 

5. Your daddy and I love each other. And we always will. One of the most important things I can show you is how to love another person. I can show you how I respect your father and how he respects me. We will speak to each other in kindness. True kindness that comes from loving and know each other. We are not perfect. Sometimes we will disagree. But we are in this together. You are our greatest work and our love for you stems from love for each other. 

4. Know that home is a safe place. No matter where we go. No matter where we live, if we are there together it is our home and home is a safe place for you to be yourself. It's okay if you're different. It's okay if your quiet. It's okay if you feel in the mood to play ball or do a little interpretative dance in the kitchen. This is your home and it is safe and you are loved here. 

3. Be kind to people. All people. People will behave in a manner that you don't understand. They will do things you don't agree with. Their actions will baffle and confuse and at times infuriate you. People will look different, sound different, believe something different, live a different way. BE KIND TO THEM ALWAYS. Kindness is never wasted. 

"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8 

2. Read lots of books and have lots of thoughts on many different topics and don't feel ashamed if those thoughts differ from other. Even mine. You are your own person with your own mind and your own complexities. It is okay for us not to agree all the time (as long as you follow the rules at my house). We are two different people and as you grow up I will respect your opinions.

1. You are special simply because God created you with a purpose in His mind, in His image. You are not here by accident. Our preacher said something recently that really struck me, perhaps so many people have issues with self-worth because they do not believe they were created by a Heavenly Father who loves them. 

And nothing. I mean NOTHING can seperate us from that love. 

"No power in the sky above or in the earth below--indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:39

Today I am linked to The Baby Shower. 

Laughter and such...

I'm not gonna lie. It's been a rough week. I've been a little sick. My boy is getting over an ear infection and I am 31 weeks pregnant. It's starting to wear on me. It's starting to show. 

Do you have those moments when you become so overwhelmed with everything it just looks like your to do list is never ending? 

Then this morning I was lying in my bed after I finished reading my devotional and I heard laughter coming from the baby's room. 

I don't know what had made him giggle. But when I walked in the room he was looking at me with a huge smile on his face. 

"I'm happy to see you," the smile said. 

I'm happy to see you I said to my fat-faced boy still in his red pajamas. 

He woke up feeling happy. He greated the day with a smile. Can't we all do that? 

Oh it's hard when you're weary. But it's worth it to take a moment, count your blessings and begin your day. 

A new baby splurge

As you can gather from reading this blog I am pretty much a tight fisted person. I don't like to see my money leave my bank account. It hurts. 

But I did make a new baby splurge when I purchased these two cute tops from my friend Jennifer at Miss AE Boutique. 

When baby brother arrives in just nine weeks (more or less) we and big brother will have these cute little tops to wear for photos. 

I am so excited! 

Since I am all about getting as much for baby as possible used or free I don't feel bad making a purchase like this. 

Has there been a time in your life where you felt okay to splurge?

Mommy Monday: Save Cash on Kid's Clothes

It's Mommy Monday and today's topic is saving money on kid's clothes. 

Kid's clothes can be pricey. But only if you let them. In my house we observe the 90/10 rule. That means 90 perent of our son's clothes are used. They are either hand-me-downs I got for free or things I purchased at Waterfront Rescue Mission and other thrift stores. 

The other 10 percent are things I get on sale at Target or Kohl's. These are items that I want special for my little boy. 

I wrote a whole series on saving cash on kid's items, including clothes. You can get a free Ebook of that series here. 

When children are as young as my son they outgrow clothes in the blink of an eye. I am not going to shell out cash I could be saving for college on tiny little shirts and pants. But that doesn't mean my son looks like a ragamuffin. 

Here are some suggestions I have gotten from readers. 

• Thred Up - This is a great website where you can get clothes, shoes, books and toys. The clothes are always in great condition and are 70 percent off of retail. They also have this great service where you can sell your kids clothes. They send you a bag, you fill it up with name brand, gently used clothing and they pay you.

Thread Up used to have a flat rate, but as Kristen from Trial and Error Homemaking (a terrific blog) points out "Thred Up changed the way they do things. It's more like a consignment store now - where you purchase individual items. For instance, when I went to their site just now, the first item was a plaid shirt in size 4 for $14.49. They list "retail values" to try to justify their prices (this shirt was apparently 72% off). In my opinion, it's not nearly as great of a deal."

Consignment sales- Last January my husband and I went to a HUGE consignment sale in Mobile. It happens twice a year and we made off like bandits. Plus the sale was running a Living Social special so that made it even sweeter. But, a little warning, when dealing with boy clothes, consignment sales aren't always a good deal- I think boys, even as babies, are hard on their clothes. Want to find a consignment sale in your area? Check outConsignmentsalfinder.org.

Here is what reader Sara J. had to say about finding kid's clothes on Cragislist: I wish someone had told me not to spend so much money on clothes! Granted I did get everything on sale when JcPenny still used coupons but they hardly look good after a couple washes and spit ups anyways! I am a military wife so i do not have the benefit of getting second hand from friends and family as we live far away from them but I have used several places for great deals. Goodwill has turned out some great bargains, sometimes getting brand new items that are donated from target. Secondly I have noticed many people selling bags of clothes for cheap on craigslist along with every other gadget you would ever need. Last but not least are garage sales! With a two month old i cannot get up on Saturday morning and grab up these good deals but I do send my hubby occasionally and clothing for .25 cant be beat!!

How have you saved big bucks on little clothes? 

Check out Erin, the other Erin and Iris to see what they have to say on this, Mommy Monday. 

Mommy MONDAY: Five Tips for New Mamas

Every mom is an expert after her baby reaches a certain age. Just ask her! But for some reason I seem overwhelming under qualified to share any advice on being a new mom. 

So here are five things I've learned in my first 16 months (today) that might help you. 

1. Things might not go the way you envision them. And that's okay. 

You might have this lovely idea that bringing home a new baby will be like your first few days of wedded bliss when you and dead husband still saw nothing but bright rays of a blissful future in each others eye.

Chances are... it won't be like that. Yes, your new baby is beautiful, perfect, stunning and everything you thought he would be. But, you will be pooped on in the first 48 hours. If you're nursing it might be hard the first few days or weeks (it took me six full weeks to get the hang of it) and you might be struggling with a lot of hormones and emotions. 

Isaiah 41:10 fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. 

2. This is life, not a beauty pageant. 

I have a friend from college who had triplets just a few weeks after I had my little boy. Yep, you read that correctly. Triplets. She said the first few weeks she walked around in her pajamas without brushing her teeth. (You can read her adventures here.)

If you have a new baby in the house your focus is the new baby. So if you get the chance to take a shower and you don't style your hair of put on something other than really stretchy pants. Who cares? 

In fact here is a bonus tip. Invest in cropped yoga pants with pockets. You will love them! 

3. Newborns sleep... a lot... but not when you want them to. So sleep when you can. 

You know that annoying thing people say: sleep when the baby sleeps? Well, there is some validity to that. I had a friend once say that was ridiculous advice because she would never do laundry or eat or go to the bathroom again. 

Okay, the eating and going to the bathroom I will give you, but the laundry will be there later. If the baby is having a snooze, lay down for a minute and g some sleep time also. And if you have to stick her in the bed with you, go for it. She will be fine!

(We hair, after a shower, week three.)

4. Take care of yourself. 

I know this contradicts what I said about life not being a beauty pageant, but take 10 minutes a day to take care of yourself. Get a shower and put on some chapstick. Even if you have to put the baby in his bouncy chair in the bathroom with you just try to take a few minutes to remember you are still a person. 

5. Don't listen to others. 

You will get a lot of advice. Most of it's trash. Just don't listen. Smile politely and walk away. If it doesn't feel right for your baby, don't do it. If it does feel right for your family, then do! 

And do not, under any circumstance let another misguided mother make you feel guilty! You are doing great. 

Check out Erin, the other Erin and Iris to see what they have to say on this, Mommy Monday. 

Five things never to say to a pregnant woman and one you always should

There is no denying that I am pregnant. My tummy protrudes from my torso like I am smuggling a Christmas ham. My nose and lips have plumped and we won't even get into the size of my rear end!

I know I am super pregnant. I have entered my third trimester and embraced all of the joys that go with it. 

My babies will be 18 months apart, so there is a small part of me that feels like I have been pregnant for two years. But I do feel incredibly blessed. I am excited to meet my sweet little boy in 11 more weeks. 

However, I do get a little tired of hearing all the things people feel obligated to say to pregnant women. I compiled a list of my favorites. 

1. Get all the sleep you can now because you never will sleep again. I have a (nearly) 16-month-old. I know all about the sleep patterns (or lack of) those first few months. I also know what it's like to chase a baby. So I got it. I'm good. Thanks. 

2. You look like you're due any day now. Nope. I still have 11 weeks. But thanks, I didn't feel fat before you said that.

3. How many babies are you having? How many times can I slap you? (I can get a little snarky.)

4. It's a boy/girl because you're carrying low/high. You can tell things just by looking at me? Quick, tell me, will I ever win the lottery. 

5. You're having two babies in under two years? You know how that happens, right? Yes. I know. Do you know? Would you like me to explain it to you?

And one thing you should always say:

You're going to be a great Mama. God has blessed this child already. 

Don't forget, I'm linked up at The Baby Shower. 

Mommy Monday: My four favorite baby items, and one I would NOT buy again

I am so excited to be blogging as a part of Mommy Monday.

Let's face it, while babies are tiny and don't take up much space, their stuff does. I remember when my son was just two weeks old, looking at the living room and thinking "where did all of this come from." 

There was a pack-in-play, a bassinet, a baby swing, and a baby gym in the middle of our tiny living room. But for some reason, even though all the stuff was "new" it felt like it had always been there. 

A lot of people will tell you you need a lot of things you don't when you have a baby. 

I thought I would share the top four things I LOVED and one thing I did not. 

1. Snugabunny cradle swing. "We need a swing," my husband said when sweet boy was just four days old. "I think he likes to be rocked to sleep."

So he went to Target to procure said swing. Oh. My. Goodness. That swing has saved my life, daily. My boy is 15 months, and pushing the weight limit and he it is still the only place he would nap. (There he is sleeping in it at a month old in that photo above.)

It was spendy, but in retrospect worth every dime and Fisher-Price even replaced the motor in it for free. 

2. Swaddle Me Blanket. I call this the "baby burrito." I figured out during week two that my son needed to be swaddled in tight and it worked. He conked out in just a few seconds. 

My dad called it the baby straight jacket. I called it genius. 

Sweet boy, four days old, loving his bouncy chair.3. Bouncy Chair. My sister told me to register for a bouncy chair. Man, I'm glad I did. There were a few nights in the beginning when that was the only place our boy would sleep. 

And he continued to love it when he got a little older, too. Between the soothing vibrations, the colorful fabric and the toys that hung from it, it was his favorite place to be. 

4. Baby Gym.  This could very well fall under the category of things you could live with out, but my baby boy loved it. I used it for tummy time and when he wasn't on his tummy be loved the lights, music and colors. Even though he is WAY to big for it now, he still wants to play with the hanging toys. 

And one thing I hated. 

I decided very early on to make my own baby food. I could control what went in it. I knew there were no preservatives and I could buy a lot of fresh, local produce at our farmers market. 

But one item I hated was the Babies-R-Us baby food storage containers. You can see from the pictures that the plastic containers were flimsy and the lids would not stay shut on them, so much of the food became freezer burned. 

I just started using glass baby food jars I got from the few times we traveled and needed to use store bought baby food. 

Were there any baby products you couldn't live without? 

Check out Erin, the other Erin and Iris to see what they have to say on this, Mommy Monday. 

This post contains affiliate links. 

Thoughts from the comfy chair: He is still a baby

I smiled politely at the woman as I disagreed with her. 

"He isn't a baby anymore, he is a big boy," she said. 

"No," I smiled back at her. "He is still a baby." 

I didn't know the woman, I would have disagreed with her anyway. 

My sweet boy is 15-months-old. In about 12 weeks he will be a big brother and I will have two sweet boys. 

But just because he will be a big brother doesn't mean he isn't a baby. He walks, he feeds himself, he tries to be independent. But he is still a baby. 

I heard him crying this morning at 4 a.m. The house was pitch black. The rain was beating down heavily on the awning outside our windows. I had been awake, exhausted, but unable to sleep due to the many "joys" pregnancy brings. (Restless legs and heartburn anyone?)

I stumbled my way into his room to find my sweet boy sitting up in his bed. His big blue eyes looking up at me. His little arms extended. "I need my mama," his face said. 

When I picked him up he tucked his little knees up under him and curled into a ball on my chest. He let out a little sigh. I pressed my cheek to his forehead, he felt hot. His fever was 101. He always runs a fever when he cuts teeth and right now he is working in his dreaded molars. 

I curled up with him in our comfy rocking chair. I was exhausted, I wanted to sleep, but these quiet moments of getting to cuddle with my little man are few and far between. I am always chasing him as he runs from place to place around the house. I am chasing these moments and they are getting away from me. 

He is still a baby. He started to doze off in my arms, his breaths coming heavy against my face. 

Why do we need children to grow up so fast? The world will push and pull and bend him into adulthood if I let it. It will come on fast and strong and in the blink of an eye if I don't watch closely. It is my job, my calling, my mission to see he grows slowly. 

He has the rest of his life to be a big boy. A child. A young man. A grown up. But he has just a season, a year or two or three (if I'm lucky) to be a baby. 

He has his whole life ahead of him, and it will be a good life, hopefully made easier because he was given the gift of room and time to grow. 

I won't rush it. He is still a baby. He is my baby.